Am I just the product of thinking someone wanted me to call them the "n" word? I was getting up and at it when that happened. I guess it had to be included in my life. I've been good in a way, but I've had episodes, like not so bad lately though. Like, it's just I dunno, I don't even know if it's anything. I know this discipline existed before the incident. Why wasn't this a big deal before? I know the issue was floating in the air, and I think it's silly someone wanted me to do that. Really. It wasn't good for me, neither. It's only taken about 2 years, though, not 3 yet. That's hard to believe, but those 2 years mattered. Things are better for me healthwise now, somehow. I've had things happen, though. Like, things happen to me more than the curse words that have popped into my head recently, maybe.
I wonder how much I should regret going to college in New Orleans. I dunno. I just regret not taking 12 hours. I used to always post about what I wish I did. Let me get into it again.
I think even before I started, but I dunno, that it was said that Music Education is the hardest thing, and I was focusing on even more than just that. So, that rules out that dream. Basically, it's about performance and music education is more of a factory job.
Another nice thing I learned on my own was that the Bachelor of Music requires less general studies courses than the Bachelor of Arts in Music.
I'm thinking voice, but then I think of how I was recommended out of the College of Music. That's strange. I really went on a journey to another world when I did music up north during the hurricane semester. I don't regret anything I did other than going downhill in it because of my environment, like construction.
It's funny, there used to be a new building of the Music Communications Complex. Also, people often doubled in Communications and Theater. I guess I was set along the right path. I was too young, though, to realize what was good for me, for some reason.
Also, the ballet program was too much for too little. The college next to it, where I used to eat sometimes later on, had a dance major, but I just wanted ballet.
Now, it's a big thing that it's Theater Arts and Dance, too. The only dance program, though, is a minor in Ballet.
My mom told me my organ teacher asked why I didn't go into science. Also, my organ teacher said she'd keep teaching me organ. Later on, she said I could do whatever I want. She was from New Orleans but lived in the suburb where I lived. Her husband I think owned a hotel. She used to live in a popular neighborhood next to my piano teacher, who was in her 70s, from the Bronx, was Italian, and got certificates at Juilliard. When we had the adult choir party, though, she had a very expensive house. I think the rug over her bed was over a million dollars. I've never seen a place as nice as that. I think it all smelled like wine and made my head pump when I got home. I've never drank alcohol.
I know I took a hard course in high school and my grades dropped and I wanted to make up for it by doing honors in college, which turned out to be less work than non-honors courses. Major courses tend to be easier, too.
Voice would have been fun, but I don't want to be cut and sold into opera. I was thinking voice and ballet, but how would I take less courses that way? I guess it doesn't matter. That's what I wish I did, though I learned a lot from piano and organ.
So, here's the master plan:
Year 1 Semester 1
1. Recital Hour - 0 cr. hrs.
2. Freshman Voice Lab - 0 cr. hrs.
3. Major Ensemble - 1 cr. hr.
4. Voice - 2 cr. hrs.
5. Theory 1 - 4 cr. hrs.
6. Technology for Music Students - 0 cr. hrs.
7. Ballet - 3 cr. hrs. - I wish I dedicated my senior year of high school to ballet instead of splitting it up with gymnastics and music school. When I went to college, I was put in the 2nd & 3rd levels my 1st year.
8. Minor Ensemble - 1 cr. hr.
9. Honors General Studies - 3 cr. hrs.
10. Honors General Studies - 3 cr. hrs.
Total - 17 cr. hrs.
I guess I just had to lay off the sweets and pizza my 2nd year. I wonder if I could still fit in time to work out. I used to eat a lot of snacks, too, but healthy snacks like crackers and cheese.
So, that's enough of an idea for what I did.
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